Her
slick powerful torso shot in spiralling waves around the bay. Each
pulsing motion of her heart sped across the water and plunged into
that briny place. It was as if she had become the dolphin, and all
those yearnings spat themselves upon the sandy reach, with each
effulgent leap and every joyful breach.
The
stone she held within her heart, the heart shaped stone she had found
upon the sand, no longer felt so heavy, no longer sat so cold in the
winter winds of that icy and solemn place, and she drifted in the
tide for a while, with the roll of the gentle sea easing her beyond
the breakers, each sigh lifting the stone, imperceptibly, gently,
until it slipped between the red cliff'd walls of her silent shore,
and glistened in the far depths once more, and was gone.
One
last leap, one last breath, was all it took, and she was gone. Gone
into the salty depths, as they fell upon her hands, leaking between
her slim delicate fingers, mingling with the waters between the
grains of her golden and yielding shore.
In
wonder she saw that the sea, that seethed beneath her feet, licked
upon those small droplets, embracing them as a mother embraces her
young, and wondered how many tears had been shed to fill so great a
sea, how many loves had been lost over countless centuries that they
now washed upon her bare white toes, in this winter, this winter in
which she froze.
The
wind whipped in gusting squalls across the bay, and began to dry
those ruddy vestiges upon her flushed rosy face. The blackened
streaks marked the scars left unseen, deep beneath those salty waves
of grief, and made a fractured china doll of her. A broken remnant of
Victoriana, sullenly standing upon the waters edge, peering through a
cracked face at the white horsed promise of hope, that rose in tides,
only to sink again into the unfathomable depths, forlorn.
Why
had he gone? She did not know, nor would she ever know, he had come
as the sun comes in the spring, warm and tender, riding on a wild
cloudless dawn, thrilling her with his rays, filling her veins and
sinews, so long left cold, with a heat only new love, new hope, can
bring. He had come as a blade of grass comes, bright and luminous
from out the muddy ground of winters retreat. A testament of natures
cyclical gift of hope. He came with unbridled joy, and it had seemed
to her, that the solitude and solemnity of her youth, those long
lonely anguished hours of silence, in the dark endless nights of her
eternal December, were banished, but for a while, by the herald of
this suns golden March.
It
was, as a fairy tale is, full of bright hope, and dark remnants of
despair, one upon another, shining brightly between dark columns in
dim lit passageways of reverie. It could not last, she had known this
from the start, for no great love that sweeps majestically within the
course of natures hallowed ground lasts beyond its year. It comes
from out the silences and solemnity of winters frozen ground, melting
into cavernous and raging torrents of passionate might with the
spring, crashing through the mountains breach, smashing the fortress
boulders with thunderous intolerance, until in bright summer, it
whiles away, sweet and sensual, the endless days. Even then she had
feared the fall. From the start she had feared, the tumbling icy
fall, the fall... So distant in those days, yet ever present, as a
shadow is present in the grip of the light as it shines upon the
object of ones desire. The fall that would clasp its greedy talons
upon her heart, ripping it in ceaseless screams from her tremulous
chest, and dashing into the chasm from whence that love and hope did
start.
Yet
it was not love lost that swept upon her now, nor the broken hopes,
the imagined hopes of youthful fancy, and there careless whispering
lies, that hide the searing truth of the illuminated sky. It was not
that. It was something far more dark and dangerous, far more sinister
to a wild heart. It was rather that she was to be married, and in
that moment of her cold silent winter, this marriage was the
contrariety of that place she had treasured. That warm spring sun,
that endless June brocade of flowers and giggling ecstasy. It was, to
her, as if she were to be bound into an endless winter, never to
taste the fruits of the passion'd vine, nor smell the musk of a sweet
oiled lover, slip in tides across her fulsome yielding bosom. Never
to nestle in a bed of summer grass, caressed by the fragrance and
intoxication of wild flowers and strong hands.
She
was to be married, like chattel, like so much common cattle, and
where, before, her wild heart had beat to the thrill of her loves
former glory, thundering out its sonorous fury, even as memory, now,
only a chained and desolate remnant remained.
In
that vacuum of space, her chest broke apart, and flooded the sands
with its grief. It was as if her heart became one with the sea, so
that slowly, yet with mindless surety, her feet followed that distant
march, the wild and fervent drum beat, into the depths, one solemn
step at a time.
Graceful
as a swift upon the summer air she came, powerful and majestic, no
turbulence nor torpid vestige of doubt raced within her now. In play
she came, and as she came, she tore upon the ragged waters surface
with such ease. Her length slender and firm. She came in a great arc
of power and purpose, to greet this wild heart that had sort her out,
as a wild thing might know another, as life might know the edge of
death, the forge of its freedom. In that moment, that final moment of
numbed remembrance, two wild souls met. It seemed in that moment of
last hope, that her heart, her cold and failing heart, filled once
more with a radiance, and bathed her soul in the soaking warmth of a
golden light, in the chilling bitterness of those frigid waters.
Her
golden waving locks swam in somnolent streams over the alabaster
remnants of her fading glory, and as she sank into that icy reach,
she felt a nuzzling delta of silken smooth grace, powerful and
gentle, take her cold numbed hand, guiding her into that deep blue
womb. Two wild hearts, one full, one fleeting, both now retreating
into the mothers womb, the endless blue womb, the womb of all souls.
Two wild hearts descending, into the wild hearted ocean, the mother
of all wild hearts, from whence all are born, and all, in there time,
return.
© Richard Michael Parker 2011
© Richard Michael Parker 2011
My thanks to Izabella for the use and inspiration of her beautiful artwork.
ReplyDeleteOoh - one of my fave Izabella images! Enjoyed your colorful prose.
ReplyDeleteAlso brought to mind Kate Chopin's The Awakening (been ages since I read that; will have to pull it out again - hopefully my reference isn't off)
thank you Stacey, yes one of Bella's most beautiful works, so many!... i shall have a look for the work you mention.
ReplyDelete